Archive for February, 2010

Haley is 12 weeks!

Haley is now 12 weeks and my time staying at home has come to an end.  I am happy and sad at the same time of this milestone.  However, today was her first day completely away from me.  I learned that she made quite an impression on daddy by pooping all over him.  Hehe.  I also find that if you watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer and change the channels on her, she’ll give you the stank eye.  She did attempt to roll over today as well.  I was giving her a bath few hours ago and noticed she is finding her foot well planted to the floor and giving it a push.  Not quite enough to be rolled over.  We had a busy week.  Last Friday we had a hip ultrasound (for being a breech baby) and the results was normal.  Yayy!  Her doctor wanted to be sure and on the safe side to have it checked out. 

Then Saturday was quite the day for both Ian and I as we headed out to the NHRA drag racing.  We went with our friends and had an alllll day fun.  Of course, the morning was quite rainy, but that didn’t stop us from having fun.  Luckily, we seized a table just when we arrived to check out our seats early in the morning.  We were huddled up in the corner of a tent.  The company had lots of beer and I ended up being the DD.  Heck, one cup of beer was just enough to make me sleepy but that was all I had.  I had fun regardless. 

While Haley was with her auntie, I spent the entire day shopping for return to work clothes.  Yup, a shopping spree.  I think I have 8 shirts, 1 short sleeve blazer, 4 sleeveless vests, 1 bolero, 3 jeans, 2 dress pants, and 2 new shoes all for $400-500.  I invested in the shoes, jeans, and dress pants since I knew they will last me a while.  The shirts aren’t the issue for me and can always find them.  In fact, I also went to the Bare Minerals shop and got myself a bit more to add to my collection.  I think I should be set for quite a while.  I did get their lip gloss, supposedly to give you a tingle after being applied.  It was pretty cool.  I tried on the color before I left the store and was trying to find a natural look.  I finally found it.  I’ve always had an issue with lipsticks and just didn’t like it.  Maybe I just needed that gateway before other options are explored.  We’ll see what the future holds for lipstick…  As long as it is natural, of course.  I don’t want to look like a painted clown!  I even did some shopping yesterday evening. 

I think my biggest find was today, which were my dress shoes.  I was getting disappointed of the store’s selection and started wandering through the store once more to see if I had missed anything.  There was some garbage in my purse and I had collected it to throw it away in the back of the store.  Right then and there, there was the shoe I’ve been looking for!  No heels, not too high, dressy for work, can wear it on casual days too.  Score!  Ian says they look like ballet flats.  It was t.h.e. best feeling when I first tried it on.  I thought, man, I wish I can find a 2nd pair I can buy while I’m here and didn’t have much luck.  I started to head to the front and check out.  Score again!  I found sort of a low heeled loafer, but super comfortable!  I was scared of going to DSW and losing too much time there and instead went to Famous Footwear.  I’m glad I did.  I think I’ll be buying another shoe from that brand sometimes in the future.  For now, my shopping spree is on hold so I can use the remainder money on perhaps capris/shorts and some shirts I may find in the future… 

Back to Haley news…  She’s adorable as ever.  Her personality is coming through.  Quite the laid back baby but when she’s upset, she will be quick to let you know.  Earlier this week, we started a “pretend” work day for me so I can time myself of when we needed to get up, it wasn’t all that bad but still need fine-tuning.  After I feed her and she’s been bottle-fed, she’ll hang out on the bed with Daddy in her Boppy facing towards the TV.  That right there reminded me of a picture either my mom or Gramma has of me being held by Grampa in his bedroom.  I am almost sure it was the same setup. 

Here’s Haley at 12 weeks.  She’s nearly 3 months.  I’m having a hard time wraping my head around how long it has been since having Haley.  Time goes by just too fast for my sake.  This coming week, she has another hearing exam.  I suppose it is more in-depth to find out some more information about Haley’s hearing.  Oh well.  I won’t be able to attend for that one anyways since it’s too soon to my return to work date to even have any time off earned.  Oh well, I’ll just send Daddy off with her.  She’ll be taped up like a cyborg again.  Tee hee. 

12weeks a

12weeks b

“When did it hit you?”

I was asked earlier in the week by another mom-to-be:

“When did it hit you that you were/are going to be a parent to a real baby who is going to totally depend on you and will be around for the rest of your life?”

For a long time, I have always wanted to be a mom.  At almost 2 1/2 years after getting married, Ian and I learned we were pregnant.  I must say we decided we were ready for children probably halfway between the time we got married to the time we got pregnant.  Since finding out, we were focused on getting ready for the baby, making sure I was healthy, going to all appointments.  The due date kept getting closer and closer.  I knew from the day we found out we were pregnant that our life is changed forever.  I was excited for those changes but scared at the same time for the unknown as it was our first pregnancy.  The good kind of scary.  I would look up all the different symptoms, experiences, and that kind of thing out of books or online.  Sure, they can prepare you for that moment of the pregnancy or what is coming up next.  But what the books or online cannot do is preparing you for the “after” or the changes one would go through.  Everyone experiences them differently.  No one will know what will happen from that point.  Babies aren’t sent  home with an instruction manual.

Reality sank in that I would have this baby totally depend on me probably in the last month of pregnancy.  It really hit me hard in a good way.  What the “after” part that no one mentions is the moment that you might be thinking, “Now what?”  I admit I had thought this just as soon as I saw Haley in the operating room for the first time and again when I held Haley for the first time in the recovery room.  I remember spending the time in her room looking at the car seat realizing that Haley would be using that very soon.  The same thought ran across my head when I looked in her crib.  The moment I held Haley, my life really changed.

It was not in a negative way where I asked myself, “Now what?”  It was more so that the books don’t prepare any new parents for the “after”.  We all have to go through trial and error to learn our babies.  They don’t come with instructions manual.  Didn’t I say that already?  Even though my c-section was scheduled at the 38th week after finding out she was in frank breech position, I remember having the weird senstation of knowing that I would not be pregnant a day after that due date.  Of course, Haley wanted to come early to meet her mama and daddy.  I think it is so hard to really put it down in words of how the “after” really felt.  All I really remember was those sleepless nights to make sure Haley was okay, the diaper changes, the frustrating feeding sessions with her, the trial and error, and most difficult of all, the recovery process.  However positive or negative those experiences were, they were the rites of passage that new parents would go through, no doubt about that.  Even though they were a blur, those times were the most precious of all that no books or information online may have ever prepared us for.  It was probably a bit more scarier when we came home from the hospital without the help of the friendly staff of nurses or the helping hand of the hospital staff.  It was just now us, mama and daddy, home with the baby in a big house.  Every day was such a special moment, however bad or good it may have been, it was a present for us.  When Ian is away, I try to tell him about Haley’s day so he doesn’t miss a thing.   I am afraid I may not have 100% put out what it really felt like for the “When did it hit you?” moment, but it is what I can think of at this point.  I think that’s part of the reason why I try to blog on a weekly basis to show my journey as a new parent and what is happening with myself in my life. 

In fact, I find myself tracing along the scar of where Haley was pulled out.  I like to think it more of my battle scar.  Every time I trace on it, I think back on the special few days in the hospital with Haley and all the transition periods we have gone through especially those sleepless nights and the screwed up sleeping schedules to the point where you wake up and not sure if you are still dreaming or really awake trying to tell reality from fanasty.

Haley is 11 weeks!

I don’t know why I continue to use weeks because at this point I should be using months.  But then again, I like updating on a weekly basis so I can reflect on the week itself rather than a whole month.  This past week have been quite busy as Haley had some more outings.  I brought her with me to meet the interpreters at lunch.  It wasn’t a lot of them but a handful of them.  They had a blast meeting Haley.  In fact, I put Haley in her baby jeans for the first time.  She got long enough to wear them however, Ian decided to call them her Urkel pants.  Really?  Really, honey?  Why don’t we find a thick black glasses with taped center to boot?  Anyhoo, Haley is becoming more expressive these days.  She is always ready to greet us with a smile on her face when we are in front of her.  Usually she would smile after her nap, during diaper changes, heck, anytime!  I love those gummy grins.  I could hear her saying “ah-ah” and then smile or the other way around.  There is no doubt she loves making bubbles with her mouth.  In fact, I may have had caught them on camera (I just can’t find the pictures but I guarantee you it’s in the gallery). 

This past week, she has been enjoying her bath quite a bit.  In the past, I would just wash her and lather her up as quickly as possible as the doctor told us to try and keep her as warm as possible.  Babies doesn’t hold heat just as well.  These days, she’s getting a lot better with that or should I say more tolerable?  So I decided to let her have a bit more fun in the baby bath tub.  I would move her legs as if she would be kicking the water.  She l.o.v.e.s. that!  Even though she doesn’t kick on her own with intent for splashing, but she does love it.  I suppose it is the feeling of the skin hitting the water. 

I have been quite busy cuddling with her as my return to work day is approaching.  However, that is not a problem at all as the nursing sessions are quite long.  I adore those quite moments when it is just her and me.  I recalled having a lot of frustration in the beginning because I hated not knowing how much she ate from my black boxes.  There’s no way for us to measure that as opposed to feeding her formula afterwards to fill her up.  There were times that I felt like I wasn’t providing enough for her, that I wasn’t enough of a mom to do that.  Thankfully Ian talked me back to Earth saying that I did a whole lot more than many moms may try for their children.  He recognized that I tried my hardest and some more while most don’t put forth half the effort.  This does not mean that other moms are not doing their best too, everyone puts forth their best in different ways.  If I had given up on breastfeeding, for sure I wouldn’t have those special sessions with just her and me.  I know I still feed her with the bottle, but it isn’t the same.

On the developmental side, Haley does very well when we sit her up but with assistance.  She can hold her head up when she is on our chest, but not so much on her own on the floor.  In fact, I did have a nap or two with her sleeping on my chest.  That was the best feeling in the world, just sleeping with her, feeling her warmth, and her feeling my heart beat as a soothing measure.  I suppose it is more of giving myself a reason to slow down and to savor that moment of the smallness before life zips by.  This is the same reason I find when I nurse Haley, to sit back and enjoy those small moments.  On a funny note, when Haley fusses, she would sometimes cry one short loud cry.  I know I caught it on video, just still dealing with trying to convert it somehow… 

I was asked earlier in the week by another mom-to-be about how well I felt I was prepared up to the point of the pregnancy, but that is a whole another post…  Here are some pictures from the past week.  The first picture is a small quick project I did to make her some leg warmers.  I did hem the ends by hand but think sewing machine would make it much easier and more even.  The second picture is kind of cute, almost a smirk, but not really.  Then the third picture is her with her baby jeans.  So cute.  This baby jeans I love!  It has snap open access to the diaper which I love.  A lot of the jeans I looked these days doesn’t have this kind of quick access.  I would rather leave the jeans on as opposed to fighting to get the jeans off and on every time. 

11weeks a

11weeks b

11weeks c

Night Out


Cyber Window Shopping…



Happy Valentine’s Day!


Haley is 10 weeks!

As it gets closer to the end of my FMLA leave from work, I find that Haley is becoming such a cutie!  She’s been doing so well and the doctor thinks she is ahead of her developmental milestones.  She loves her floor time but not as much as her tummy times.  I think she prefers to be helped sitting upright rather than on her tummy these days.  She continues to make funny noises, gurgles, cooing, and I think I heard her giggling the other day.  I think she also recognize who her mama and daddy is as every time I put her down or approach her after a nap, she smiles.  When Ian plays with her, she smiles as well.  I’m still working on capturing those gummy grins.  ::stalking for a good timing::

We have found that Haley really enjoy car rides.  When we are in motion, she doesn’t cry as much or is enjoying the ride.  But, when we are at a light or stopping, she starts to fuss a bit.  I also gave her a bath on Monday.  As always, she loves it.  I tried to show her how fun it is when the water is being splashed with her legs.  Her face wasn’t sure at the new experience but she seemed to like it very much.  When I put shampoo on her head and lathering up, she’d roll her eyes as if she likes it.  Hmm, maybe that means in the future when she gets her hair done like mama, she’ll love that also. 

We moved her changing table from the living room to her bedroom.  The reason it was there in the living room was to keep it as easy as possible for me during my recovery time and for a short distance.  With the frequency becoming further apart, we decided to move it to her bedroom.  Of course, my fear is if she catches us with a yellow stream, it’s going to hit the carpet.  Which means lightning fast changes.  ::diaper whipping in the air:: 

With her sitting up, I’ve been looking at a Bumbo for her.  It would let Haley sit upright on her own since she is getting better with head control.  It comes in different color.  I have seen purple, aqua, yellow, pink, blue, green, even orange.  Most likely I would be getting blue or green.  We shall see what is available when I go pick it up.  I have a coupon for like 40% off and it would be a good buy than without coupon, obviously.  I had gotten that coupon when I picked up my breast pump.  Short story for that…  As candid as possible, it was my intention to continue feeding Haley and it would make it possible for me to pump at work.  If I don’t pump, I would risk encouring my supply to stop altogether much earlier than I wished. 

Another thing that is funny when watching Haley napping.  If she has her soothie and pops it out of her mouth, sometimes I see her dream sucking like she thinks it is still in her mouth.  Hehe, so cute.  I think I may have caught it on video, just I have to figure out how to get it posted.  Sometimes she would have either hand on her face.  She does like sucking on her fist or if she’s lucky, her thumb.  She did attempt to put both hands in her mouth.  I don’t think it would work that way honey…  One at a time, can’t have both.  I did catch a picture or two of her holding her nose as if she’s saying something stinks.  I showed it to Ian and he thought it was funny. 


Look at what we caught on camera…


New Mama Skills

The past two months, I have discovered many new talents I can do while I have Haley with me. 

  • Use of my left hand
  • Ability to get off the floor without the use of my hands
  • Write papers and bounce Haley at the same time
  • Being mobile while nursing (this is risky for some pain on my nips I don’t do it right)
  • Fast diaper changes
  • Use of my feet to pick up Haley’s blanket or burp cloth while nursing
  • Many more to come! 

Over the weekend, I’ve packed away Haley’s newborn clothes and I had a moment of sadness putting them away that it was getting so far away from our special day but closer to the days to come.  We also had some friends visiting to watch the Super Bowl game with us, good times.  We all had some fun and I think Haley stole the spotlight from the game.  Hehe.  What a good baby she was, she was quiet most of the time and just wanted to chill.  I had her sitting upright and facing out to see everyone and she loved it.  She was more fascinated when everyone was signing. 

This morning, I needed to drop off Ian at his work since he was getting some work done on his Miata car for his project, I was getting my things and getting ready to head out.  As I walked to the kitchen, I could have sworn I heard and saw Haley laughing.  It was pretty awesome.  I would say it was more of a giggle.  I must say it was pretty cute when I heard that.

Haley is 9 weeks!

9 weeks!?!  Well more like 2 months old as of yesterday…  Haley had quite the busy week!  She has been trying to figure out how to roll over from her back to belly and from belly to back.  On her back, she would plant her feet on the floor and sort of push herself away while trying to have her back arched.  That would give her about halfway point of being on her side and her back, but not actually far enough to roll forward.  At her 2 months check-up yesterday, her pedi said she should be rolling by 4 months and was pleased to hear that she is attempting this young.  He mentioned she is a bit ahead of the game this age around in rolling over.  She would continue to find her hand in her mouth but still figuring out to get her thumb out in order to suck.  It’s mostly getting her fist wet.  Few days ago, I saw she tried to fit the whole fist in her mouth.  Silly girl! 

For a while now, I have not written about the dogs and Haley and how they are getting along.  Here it is!  Cosmo is spending a lot of time with her and watching her.  Sort of guarding her I would think.  Sometimes when she fusses, he comes running and checks on her and gives her a lick or two.  Then there’s Leila, considering her history prior to adopting her, she is slowly accepting Haley, but wouldn’t want to be near her these days.  She’s doing a lot better in letting Haley being near her.  We are giving her some time to grow onto Haley.  I think she is more scared of Haley than not liking to be around her.  We consistenly praise her whenever she is near Haley to show it isn’t a bad thing at all. 

Haley is also now in size 1’s diaper.  We ran out of newborn sizes on 2/1 and as of yesterday officially on size 1’s.  Our little girl is growing!  She seems to be wearing less of the newborn clothes as well and more on the 0-3 months (the 3’s from Carter’s).  Some of the newborn sleepers she is still able to fit in.  Haley’s appointment with her pedi yesterday went well.  She grew another 1.5 inches and gained 3 pounds 10 ounces.  Wow!  If I remember right, she had the highest jump in her weight scale.  We told the doctor that she is eating quite well.  She nurses from both sides plus a bottle of formula.  She would typically eat 4 oz on top of the boobs.  Sometimes Ian would let me sleep more when I need it and feed her the bottle, she would usually get 6 oz.  I remember she would nurse from both sides plus 2 oz early on and we upgraded her to 4 oz bottles just before she turned 1 month old, if not, younger than that.  Her new bottles did wonders.  We also switched her formula from the blue lid to the red/orange-y lid.  We figured since we consume soy than cow’s milk, she was fussy from that.  It’s worked out quite well and will stick with it.  She’s been doing quite well with her tummy time and I am seeing more head control.  When I hold her up in front of me (assisted sitting), she can hold her head better with some control and not as floppy. 

In addition to yesterday’s appointment, she also got her shots.  Poor girl was crying so hard that she turned red in the face.  She did, however, get her pretty band-aid from the nurse giving the shots.  On the left leg, she got a silver glittery and on the right leg, she got a pink/yellow Tweety bird.  It was really cute.  I cannot believe she turned 2 months!  There is a comparison of how much she grew at 1 month vs. 2 month with her teddy bear (which was mine 10+ years ago).  I hope to continue having the bear in her “months” picture to show for comparison.  The bear will hold her and eventually she’ll hold the bear.  Wow…  I still can’t get over at that thought.  I cherish each and every day with Haley. 

The countdown is on for my return to work which will be at the end of this month.  As much as I hate to return to work, I look forward to some adult time as well.  So that can be the silver lining there.  I also know for the first 12 weeks of her life, she got a lot of attention from me and especially Ian when he was able to stay with me and helping me recover.  He returned to work earlier this year.  It was just Haley and me.  I love those girl times.  It makes me think back of all the girl times with my mom and Gramma, to be honest.  I hope that we can continue this with Haley now in picture.  Enough rambling!  Here’s a picture of Haley which was taken no more than a week ago (I usually try and pick the favorite picture I took in the past week)…  In this picture, she was so fascinated with the living room fan and wouldn’t take her eyes off it.  About 10 minutes later she passed out and we put her down for the night.